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A Journey to Couples Therapy

Updated: Feb 15

Couples Therapy

Couples seek therapy for a myriad of reasons, encompassing challenges in communication, frequent conflicts, ongoing disagreements about practical matters like finances and parenting, as well as issues surrounding intimacy and sex. The discovery of infidelity by one or both partners is another common trigger for seeking therapy. For couples contemplating separation, therapy serves as a crucial tool for assessing whether the relationship can be salvaged or for navigating a breakup in a constructive and healthy manner. This approach becomes particularly valuable for couples with children who aim to co-parent effectively even after parting ways. It's important to note that opting for couples therapy does not necessarily signify an inevitable breakup. Instead, couples may discover through the therapeutic process whether an amicable dissolution is the most suitable outcome for both individuals.

Couples therapy is really very beneficial especially for one or both partners is struggling with physical issues, anxiety attacks, depression or any issues that you thing attributes the problem. Such issues can affect the connection between partners, and in these cases, the affected couple can also seek individual therapy.

In situations involving domestic violence or various forms of abuse, couples therapy may be employed cautiously. However, if you think your safety is jeopardize. Do not hesitate to seek help and call the local authorities if worst comes to worst.

What happens during the therapy? The couples therapy experience is shaped by various factors, including the specific issues motivating the couple to seek help, the therapeutic approach employed, and the unique dynamics and preferences of each couple. While the details can vary, couples generally share their concerns, express their emotions towards each other and the relationship, delve into personal and shared histories, and acquire practical skills such as anger management, conflict resolution, and collaborative problem-solving to navigate challenges more effectively in the future. It's really not uncommon couple to enter therapy with a desire to solve their issue but normally for couple they are in denial as to who is at fault or the root cause of the relationship's problems. However, it's important to recognize that a competent and couples therapist is not bias. Instead, their role involves assisting both partners in understanding, accepting their contributions to the larger issues within the relationship and fostering empathy by encouraging them to see things from each other's perspective.

Typically, couples therapy sessions involve both individual partner participates together. In certain situations, therapists may conduct individual sessions one at a time or both partners to gain deeper insights into their issues. There are also cases where an individual may attend couples therapy alone, often because their partner is not open to therapy or doesn't believe in its efficacy. This flexibility allows therapists to address the needs of each individual within the context of the relationship.

How does it work?

The functioning of romantic relationships holds significant importance in our lives, and when they encounter difficulties, the impact on partners' well-being, daily functioning, and other relationships can be substantial. However, many couples find it challenging, if not impossible, to address dysfunction independently. Deep-seated biases and established patterns of relating to oneself and others often hinder the ability to adapt one's thinking and behavior for the betterment of a romantic relationship. Additionally, personal insecurities, cultural difference can be a good reason for partners to openly discuss sensitive topics, such as sexual difficulties or your traumas.

Effective couples therapy serves as a valuable guide through this crucial yet often rewarding process. Acting as an impartial third party, the therapist assists couples in identifying patterns that keep them stuck, addresses their issue and the neutral space of the therapy room becomes a secure environment for each partner to voice their thought, hopes, and fears. Ideally, this therapeutic process fosters greater compassion, both for one's partner and oneself, and equips the couple with more productive ways to manage conflict and navigate problems as they arise.

What kind of therapist do you need?

Professional counsellor like me, Jennifer Surch, specialize in couples therapy, a form of therapeutic intervention designed to assist romantic partners in navigating relationship conflicts, enhancing communication, and fostering increased affection and empathy.

It's a misconception that couples seek therapy only when their relationship is on the verge of collapse. In reality, many couples with a strong foundation choose therapy to address specific issues that they are facing, aiming to optimize their relationship's stability to live a harmonious relationship..

The terms "couples therapy" and "couples counselling" are often used interchangeably, even within the professional community. However, it's essential to note that couples counselling typically focused on addressing a specific problem as a couple which mostly is short term, can be from 4 - 6 sessions. In contrast, couples therapy is a more specific, more extensive, it is a long-term process that delves into a couple's personal issue, tackles history and relational patterns in a more profound and open-ended manner.

For partner who are interested to couples undergo therapy should look for a reliable counsellor — like psychologist, clinical therapist or family therapist—who has completed training in couple-focused modalities. Many couples therapists have impressive background specializing in individual or couples therapy session. Like me, Jennifer Surch can surely aid and help you and your partner with you needs. Feel free to drop us a message should you want to inquire about the services I offer.

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